An unfortunate road trip
by sarcastic commentator
Summary: when he was drunk, Thomas Jefferson decided to go on a road trip, and dragged James Madison along with him. then their car breaks down in a storm. JeffMads if you squint. Oneshot. first fic, so please be kind, and reviews are greatly appreciated.
1. Chapter 1

_Monday morning_

Thomas Jefferson was incredibly happy. He was staring out from the window of his car. The sky was grey, the wind was howling, and rain was pelting at him with the viciousness of a colony angry wasps. The weather wasn't going to get better, and they had no designated destination. He looked over at his friend, James Madison, who was gripping the wheel, looking like he might topple over from exhaustion any minute.

'Are we there yet?' Thomas whined,

'No, and we don't even know where _there_ is at the moment.' Madison said, reinforcing something he had said a dozen times in the past hour.

'Besides, it's your fault we're here in the first place!'

Jefferson grinned, thinking back to what had happened last night.

' _We need to do something.' Thomas claimed, looking at Madison through glassy eyes. They were at the Schuyler Mansion, who were currently hosting a graduation party for their daughters, Angelica and Eliza. Angelica was Thomas's friend, and their way into the party._

' _Like what?' asked Madison, who seemed quite content lounging on a large, overstuffed couch_

' _I don't know. We've finished school, so we need to …. Do something! Thomas suddenly exclaimed, looking immensely pleased with his amazing idea. Madison was used to this, and definitely didn't expect his friend's insane wish to come true,_

' _Sure, why not?' he shrugged, the idea was growing more and more appealing, and he would be more than happy to spend a couple of days away from the looming prospect of college that towered over them, following them wherever they went._

' _Right now, we have no loose ends, and can quite easily do whatever we want!_

 _In two hours' time, both men were incredibly drunk, and going on a road trip._

' _We're going on a road trip!' yelled Jefferson, running out of the Schuyler Mansion, looking as he felt: very happy, and VERY drunk. Madison followed resignedly behind him, apologising profusely to the many people Thomas bowled over in his haste to see rid of the mansion, polite no matter the circumstance._

 _That very night, the two friends packed what few provisions they (thought) they needed, and left for destinations unknown._

* * *

'You _never_ disagreed with me,' Thomas commented idly

'That's because I know that you never listen to reason, and it would be better if there was a sane person in near vicinity of you, to make sure you don't _die_ ,' retorted James, done.

A pair of luminescent ovals suddenly came into view, reflecting in the heavily rain covered windshield, staring balefully at the two friends. A stag was standing on the road, and their car was heading right for the creature, which in turn, didn't seem to be moving away at all.

'Swerve!' Thomas yelled, gesturing frantically at the dark, yet blurry outline in front of them

'I _know,_ I'm being _careful,_ do you want to _die!_ ' James asked, frantically tuning the wheel in a desperate attempt to salvage both the deer and the car.

And that was how, in the middle of nowhere, during a vicious thunderstorm, a great, silver stag caused a car crash. The car crashed into the curb of the road, under the indignant stare of the animal, which quickly bounded off into the gloom, no doubt to cause more trouble.

'That _thing_ can go to hell,' Thomas muttered belatedly.

* * *

They both got out of the car, into the pouring rain, to survey the damage done to the previously beautiful car. It wasn't pretty. The entire right side of the car had smashed into a tree. It had annihilated the side view mirror, and badly dented the back doors, enough so that they were hanging open, barely staying on their hinges.

' _Oh my god'_ Thomas said, looking over his car, which he had barely had for a month or so.

'The car is ruined! Do you know how much this is going to cost? My parents are never going to get me a new one, they aren't exactly _cheap_ ,' he continued, switching into panic mode. Madison was slightly more realistic. He came out of the car, having tried the ignition key once more. The car had barely flickered.

'More importantly, we are stuck here in this miserable weather, you have no insurance, and we have nowhere to go. We are going to _die_ here!' he said, quite near hysterical. Both men were looking at the last broken vestiges wreckages of the car; wondering what they could possibly do.

* * *

Out of nowhere, Thomas started laughing.

'Less than 24 hours into our grand trip, and we're stuck outside a broken car in the pouring rain,' he said between gasps. Madison sighed, and shook his head. He _was_ usually the level headed of the two.

'Whatever the case, we are still _stuck in the middle of nowhere,_ with no means of getting anywhere either.' he reminded patiently.

'...i just realised you crashed my car. Therefore, _you_ owe me!' Thomas said, changing the subject, his hair flopping over his face, dripping wet.

'For the first time since grade school, you owe me!' he said

'Don't get used to it,' smiled Madison, lightening up slightly.

Thunder crackled over their heads, and the rain seemed to renew with startling force. Lightning crashed. The two men startled, realising it might not be the of best ideas to stay out in the cold, with the sky quickly darkening, showing signs of the upcoming dusk.

Realising that it might not be the smartest idea to stand there in the cold, waiting for a passer bye who would probably not pick up two hitchhikers anyway, Jefferson yelled, with startling suddenness 'what are we _doing_!'

'Nothing' came the reply, 'that's what my point has been all along!'

'Well, now I'm saying it! You are literally just recovering from _hypothermia,_ '

'It wasn't hypothermia, I had a _cold_ ,' retorted Madison, to no avail.

'Come on, we should walk. It's a good way to keep the heat in or something, besides, I think I saw a coffee shop or something down the road.' he said, dragging Madison back where they came from.

Madison rolled his eyes, letting himself be dragged along, looking over fondly at Thomas, who was still chattering away about getting a signal or something, so they could at least contact someone. So, the two men stumbled along the narrow road, surrounded by woods on either side; the world silent of all human noises. Their only backdrop was the incessant patter of water on tarmac, and occasional booms of thunder that seemed to crack from right above them. The world might have been out to get them, but do what it might, James Madison was the happiest he had been in a long time.


	2. bread and butter

**thanks to** Hamiltronthelegendarymusical **for giving me the idea to continue this fic! so, hopefully you see this, and please, tell me what you think, this is my first multi chapter!**

The rain was still going strong when they arrived at a run-down coffee shop 2 hours later. Thomas smiled wearily at James as he pulled oped the pretty oak door. A bell at the top of the door jingled announcing their arrival, alerting a clerk at the desk. The clerk lifted his head, showing a face full of freckles and a head full of wild, curly brown hair.  
'Hello friends! What can I get you on this lovely...Jefferson?!' the clerk said, squeaking as he saw the pair of eyes that stared at him in equal surprise. Thomas recoiled in the same fashion, while Madison simply rolled his eyes,  
'What are you doing here, Laurens, I thought you were off doing your "all lives matter" thing, in Asia,' Thomas asked shrilly, speaking as if Lauren had just appeared out of thin air, not heeding the fact that he and James had just walked into what Thomas presumed was Laurens' shop.

Laurens didn't answer in kind, simply asking them a question that should have had a straightforward answer,  
'What are you doing here, and why are you dripping wet?' he asked,  
'One would think your valet would wipe you dry before you present yourselves to here,' he said, not able to resist adding the quip onto the tail of his sentence. Madison was the first person to recover his senses from the strange situation they had found themselves in,  
'I could ask you the same thing, why are you managing a coffee shop in the middle of nowhere?' he asked coolly.

Madison had never had much of a problem with Hamilton's cronies, as long they didn't bother him, he didn't even really not like them.  
'Actually, I happen to own the Bread and Butter Cafe, and the All Lives Matter had to be postponed...something about 'technical difficulties,' Laurens said, then added,  
'they crashed the plane that was supposed to take us to Puerto Rico.' His big mouth would always get him in trouble, and he was in the process of berating himself when Jefferson answered in kind, with an even better story.  
'HA! That's even better than a drunk road trip!' Jefferson laughed, inducing Madison to simply groan, he would never hear the end of this, and Laurens was so sure to Instagram this…

'wait...You're here on a drunk road trip!' Laurens asked, almost tripping over the words in his mirth.  
'Something like that, of course I really don't think your one to talk, Mr. I once a sang a made-up song to a guy I literally just met.' Jefferson retorted quickly, then he realised his mistake, his entire face going red. Madison groaned even more, why did fate hate him so?

Laurens grinned, 'Hey, I do not regret that, besides, the PaSt aS In THe pAsT!' he yelled, purposely singing. He really did enjoy watching Jefferson's face turn a myriad of colours at the same time, while Madison simply shook his head at his friend's antics.  
'Also, please order now, you do get boring fast,' he said, completely deadpan. Madison smiled, and ordered for the two of them, as Jefferson was still in the middle of something.  
'Can we have one black coffee, and one caramel latte, with like three spoons of sugar?' he asked, determined to be polite for as long as he could manage,  
'Assuming you know what a caramel latte even is' Thomas interrupted, back on his feet.  
'if I didn't actually hate my father, I could quite actually kill your political career, with a snap of my fingers,' muttered Laurens as he set to work making his high school enemies their coffees.

Meanwhile Thomas dragged Madison away, saying that if they were going to get something from the shop, they might as well drink like civilised people.  
'Why are we still here?' he moaned as they found themselves a table in the very corner of the room.  
'Because it's still pouring outside, and we need a place to stay while it rains.' James stated resolutely. He always was the voice of reason. The two friends had never really been in such a predicament, and it was simply luck that the weight of their situation hadn't quite settled in yet.

So, they sat in their secluded corner and talked, unaware of their surroundings, the rain outside still poured, the man at the counter still spoke on the phone. Everything was peaceful. At least, until the bell rang. In walked...Alexander Hamilton.  
'Oh. My. God.' Thomas groaned, banging his head on the steel tabletop.  
'This is why we should have left as soon as we saw Laurens,' he said, shaking his head to clear out the stars that were appearing suddenly in his vision.

For once, James nodded his assent, he had once been good friends with Hamilton, but it had ended quickly after they had disagreed a few too many times. James remembered it quite well, they were both on the student council in sophomore year and Hamilton had wanted to divert school funds for scholarship students. Madison had opposed him, and Alexander had acted cold ever since, as if he had been personally offended.

'Hey Laurens, what's up?' Alex greeted as he walked through the door into his best friend's failed business experiment.  
'Hey Alex!' Laurens exclaimed, bounding around the counter,  
'Just, just look over there,' he snickered, gesturing to the table occupied by their high school nemesis, and Alex's biggest political rival.  
'Good god, you were actually telling the truth!' Hamilton exclaimed, for once glad to have been dragged away from his precious work. As he said that, the two friends at the table got up, determined to act civil, or at least one of them was.

'Well, come on,' James finally stated, standing up,  
'Might as well get this over with.'  
Thomas rolled his eyes, but followed his friend nonetheless.

Although Thomas felt nothing but deep dislike for the two friends they were approaching, James and Alexander had always had a complicated relationship. They had known each other for the entirety of 3 years, but their (fairly) similar political beliefs had bonded them quickly. However, they had also quickly drifted apart as Madison began opposing Hamilton on certain key thoughts and idealisms. They had gone from a fruitful friendship to a begrudging respect for the other in a matter of months.

'Hello Hamilton, I thought I'd finally seen the back of you for good. I must say, you've, both, dashed my hopes greatly,' Jefferson commented dryly.  
'Actually, this is the high point of my week, and I like to say that I live a fairly interesting life!' Hamilton replied, his sharp tongue heedless of the mirthful tears filling his eyes. Madison simply held out a hand to shake, ignoring Laurens' howls of laughter; Laurens was back behind the counter, cleaning pots and pans vigorously. Alex took his hand instantly, shaking vigorously.

'Hey James, how've the months been treating you?" Hamilton asked, eying Madison's thin, bony body. He took in the way the other man stood in a permanently slumped manner, as if bearing an invisible weight that was slowly but surely wearing down on him. People could say whatever they wanted about Alexander Hamilton, but none could deny the fact that he was one of the most observant minds of his age.

'...because you look like crap,' he added matter-of-factly  
'I really am fine,' Madison muttered softly.  
'You're over-worked,'  
'No, I am fine,' Madison said again, grinding out his words. Hamilton simply shook his head, claiming something about having seen the same look in the mirror multiple times.

That was when Jefferson decided to open his big mouth, for the wrong time twice in the afternoon,  
'Yeah! He is fine, and I don't see how it's any of your business to say otherwise,' Jefferson sneered.  
'Ooooh… Tom-Tom's defending his damsel in distress!' Laurens called out from behind the counter, drying his hands and joining the group that was forming in the middle of his near deserted cafe. Both James and Thomas blushed a bright red, in perfect time.  
'Gods, you even blush together!' Laurens continued in his tirade.  
'You know I hate nicknames, John,' Jefferson countered, somewhat lamely.

'Besides, you're one to talk. I really shouldn't need to remind you of just last year,' Madison added, still slightly pink. Jefferson nodded enthusiastically, jumping onto the bandwagon quite literally.  
'Yeah! The whole school shipped it, and both of you bastards were too blind to see it,'  
'You're one to call me a bastard,' Hamilton muttered, still tender on his birth status.  
Laurens quickly intercepted the escalating argument, he was not in the mood for a genuine fight.  
'How can we help it if we're just that popular, friend?' he asked lightly, trying to diffuse the tension that was starting to build up.  
'...all that happened was a drunken one-night stand, it disappointed the entire school,' James said under his breath, almost to himself.  
'You say that like even you shipped them!' Thomas exclaimed to his friend, however, Alex butted in before anyone could respond.  
'Who didn't?' he asked smilingly, he had forgiven but not forgotten the slight on his parentage.  
'I know! Even Eliza did for some time!' Laurens interjected, flitting around the room, cleaning the already shining tables; the man never seemed to be able to stay still.

Sensing the lull in conversation, Hamilton was quick to get bored, and he expressed it abruptly.  
'Well!' he said, already walking out,  
'I never realised how quickly you people got boring,' He said, mirroring his best friend unknowingly from an hour or two ago. He then proceeded to turn back suddenly and drag a surprised Laurens into the back, muttering about how he hadn't seen Laurens in forever, and how that afternoon was shaping up to be the best he had ever had.

James Madison was staring a wall in front of him. It was covered with pictures of turtles; Laurens' pet, Martha. He smiled slightly, only John Laurens would decorate a public place with pictures of his, however beloved turtle.

Hamilton's words had shaken him up more than he cared to admit; they always did. Hamilton had always had a way with words, and he used them mercilessly. He knew he looked worse than he did two months ago, but he didn't think it was portrayed so clearly upon his ragged features.

'Hey,'  
'James,'  
'Come on, pay attention!' Jefferson said, louder each time, waving a hand in front of his best friend's face. James hadn't heeded any of his previous questions, something that had been happening more and more frequently. Madison blinked, as if waking up from a coma.  
'I - I'm sorry, what did you say?' he asked, shaking his head slightly, as if trying to rid himself of an invisible wasp. Thomas simply sighed, he worried for his friend, he really did.


End file.
